You like a girl in your class or a woman in your company, but you don't know how to approach her first ? Making the first move is not easy, especially if you are the shy type or don't have a good strategy yet. If you don't know how to approach the woman who makes your heart skip a beat, here's how how to make the first move with a woman and our valuable tips for success !
Summary
- 1 10 steps to making the first move with a woman
- 2 How to make the first move with a girl ?
- 3 Top reasons to make the first move
- 4 Why is a man so hesitant to make the first move ?
- 5 Solutions for a woman waiting for a man to make a first move
- 6 Who should make the first move in a relationship ?
10 steps to making the first move with a woman
Don't turn your feelings away
Many shy boys, not knowing how to approach the girl they like, deflect their feelings. They try to make the girl understand implicitly as if they are ashamed of what they feel. It doesn't attract women. While some people try to build a friendship before admitting their feelings, others prefer to walk away by making excuses. This is not the right way to do it, you have to get to the point.
Build desire with your body
To get that girl to notice you, communicate with your body. Make sure you send and receive favorable signals. Your body language can be enough of a clue to show that person that you are interested in them. For example, put on a charming smile if she looks at you. Look at her in a tender way. Make gestures or do things that are similar to hers. Sometimes flirting is also about mimicry.
Have good discussions
In addition to physical means of flirting, you can also engage in conversations to make the first move. Chatting is an effective way to learn more about a person. You can start by talking about anything and everything without being ridiculous. Talk about a common situation you are experiencing at school or at work for example. Talk about things that might interest him.
Be assertive
L'self-confidence is one of the most attractive assets in a person. That's why most shy people can't make the first move, because they don't have that quality. If you have confidence in yourself and believe that you will succeed in this endeavor, then take the first step with confidence. You will feel comfortable talking to this person for the first time.
Be positive
This goes back to what was said above. If you have confidence to approach a girl, you must be positive about the outcome of your intention. By being positive, you adopt an interesting and pleasant attitude. You can then start the first conversations with humor so as not to stress.
Be patient
Patience, when you have the fire of love burning in your veins, is not really evident. But when you take the first step, you'll have to be patient so as not to rush the girl. If you are dealing with a girl who likes to make boys wait, you may have to go on several dates before she agrees to go out with you. But you'll know as you go out what kind of person you're dealing with and if she's interested in you or not. This can be seen from the first date.
Ensure a pleasant and entertaining outing
Making the first move involves asking the girl out or sharing a common activity. But often this situation can be embarrassing. When you have confidence and a positive attitude, you can expect her to say yes when you invite her. Invite her for a nice outing, to do things you like, like going to the movies, eating pizza, seeing a concert.
Be honest and direct
You've asked her out ! You're out to see a movie, eat pizza or do something interesting. Now comes the time when you want to ask her out, to have more affinity. This approach is often the most difficult, especially if you are unsure about the person's feelings. But by admitting your feelings directly, you'll be fixed sooner or later.
Take no for an answer
Attention, a successful first step is not only the achievement of your objectives (to conquer the person). It's also about taking risks to determine if the feelings are mutual. If not, don't insist and don't get aggressive. Be courteous and casual even if you look sad.
There's no second guessing
If you've had the unfortunate experience of being turned down, don't push it. You can change your techniques, but if it doesn't work, there's no point in taking another first step. Because it is the only one allowed and you must ensure it at all costs.
How to make the first move with a girl ?
How to pique a girl's interest ?
Often a girl realizes that a man is paying attention to her, that he is choosing her among his friends, but she doesn't know why. The duty of a young man is to persuade her that she is fighting for her heart, not only for an intimate connection. Approaching a woman as a man who loves her, rather than as an average person, is the best way to start the kind of relationship you want. There are also times when a member of the stronger sex must prove themselves, using their attractiveness and charm to accentuate their individuality without opening up completely.
It is not necessary to be immediately dressed in an elegant and glamorous way. It would be a huge mistake to make the first move with a woman. A girl is usually interested first in the personality of his suitor and then in his physical appearance.
What is it about women that men don't understand ?
Women are hard to understand. Even experienced men have trouble understanding them. Girls are not innately honest, and they can only be honest with close friends. So the words "no, maybe" are not a definitive denial, but neither is it a permission in disguise. The woman must maneuver, allowing the man to be persistent and show confidence in his choice of partner.
Take care of her hygiene and her appearance
To make the first step, the aesthetic aspect plays an important role. According to psychologists, olfactory receptors are stimulated by the cleanliness and neatness of the body, clothes and shoes, rather than by pure beauty.
Smells can either destroy the desire for an affair or, on the contrary, accelerate the love story. Perfumes enhance a man's style and serve as his calling card. The most important factor is that the perfume is not offensive to the chosen woman. Choosing the right scent will help relax the atmosphere and reduce stress on the first date.
A touch of humor
In the intimacy of a couple, the partners' sense of humor improves mutual understanding. A man's nice jokes will always be appreciated by a woman, and unpleasant circumstances will not disappoint her partner if the end result is an encouraging chuckle.
Choose your words well
It is only during face-to-face interactions that words and intonation are actively noticed. However, if a man does not have in mind a specific person he wants to meet in person, but rather a large number of virtual acquaintances, he must think about how to meet girls, what to write the first time to pique their interest and accept a real meeting.
The virtuality of the relationship is very harmful. The perfect image can fade away if it turns out that conquering the person you seem to know everything about, you end up with an unknown personality in reality. Carefully made compliments can remain as such, vulgar opinions and assumptions can be asserted, and the disappointment can be huge. In real life, don't be afraid to make the first move towards a woman. There is less unpleasantness.`
The main reasons to make the first move
Stereotypes and indecision often prevent us from developing a personal life. But sometimes you have to throw away all the complexities, stop listening to others, and just do it, as your own heart demands. In today's environment, there is no shame in making the first move; therefore, you will win even if nothing happens with a specific person. So here are the main reasons to take the first step towards a woman.
Saving time
When you spend a lot of time looking at a woman, making eye contact with her and wondering what she's up to, you're wasting the most precious commodity of all: time. Instead, things would be better if you took charge and took the initiative. Get to know her and what kind of woman she is.
Maybe she's not worth your time and you'll move on with your conscience. And if it still meets your criteria, which you have predetermined in your mind, that is a bonus. It puts an end to your anxieties and uncertainties.
Increase your options
If your network is made up exclusively of people who have made the effort to contact you, you limit your partner options considerably. On the one hand, these women are not necessarily what you are looking for, and on the other hand, you have little chance of establishing a relationship with any of them.
You wouldn't be reading this if this wasn't the case. Making the first move towards a woman you like is a great way to test your own limits. You increase your chances of meeting someone you like.
Increasing self-confidence
Not all men have the courage to make the first move. To achieve this, you must believe in yourself and your abilities. After all, not all men are ready to hear a woman's reaction, which is not always good.
Thus, every initiative you take not only brings you closer to a pleasant personal life, but it also helps you develop new character qualities that will undoubtedly be valuable in everyday life and in your work. Expect changes if you can get over yourself and gain confidence. You know that confident men attract women like a magnet, right? ?
Acquire knowledge
Even if a woman rejects your initiative, getting restless and giving up on making the first move is not worth it. After all, you have an advantage: you don't have to suffer from the answer, whether she likes you or not, and most importantly, you can consider it another stage of life and a new experience that will help you in the future.
Also, when you get to know a woman or make advances to existing friends, you discover new aspects of women's personalities, habits and predilections. After examining each of your encounters, you will be able to create partnerships with a better understanding of female qualities in the future.
Making the first move is attractive
Women admit that men who are interested in them and make the first move seem hotter and more desirable to them. She can instantly open up and be herself, rather than playing a certain role, as if she is seeking your attention. It turns out that this is hidden somewhere deep in her instincts, so why not use this little lever to manipulate her desires ?
Why is the man so reluctant to make the first move ?
Every liberated woman desires a whirlwind romance, an impulsive and explosive connection that stirs strong feelings within her. When a handsome guy shows up on the horizon, expressing his interest in a modest but obvious way, a woman expects a decisive action from him – at least, an invitation for a date.
But he does not behave as expected. He just smiles, flirts and compliments. In this case, the woman practically falls into a coma, and his mind instantly wonders why he didn't ask her for her phone number or invite her to the movies. Let's try to understand what prevents a man from making the first step towards a woman he likes.
According to psychologists, the basic explanation for the "lethargy" of men is fear of rejection. It is more frequent in those who do not have confidence in themselves. Maybe a man has turned down other women repeatedly, or they have cheated on him, or he is simply a weak-willed man who prefers to delegate the initiative to others.
Another factor that prevents a man from making the first approach is his extreme self-confidence. He feels so attractive, rich and unrivaled that he doesn't want to waste his time and energy trying to win a woman over – he'd rather let her fight for him. As a result, another explanation for the uncertain behavior: a guy has wasted the attention of women; he has many underlings to whom he lavishes as much attention as he wants. In other words, such a man is a real womanizer who doesn't care about flirting.
The third explanation for the man's lack of action comes from his past: he may have just separated from another woman but still have affection for her. He can't get her out of his head, which prevents him from meeting other fascinating women.
Besides, another cause of a man's inaction is a failure in the past – he simply does not want a new serious relationship. Such a man is irritated by all women, considering them "identical" and "unworthy" of his attention.
Whatever preconceived ideas or assumptions you may have, there is a perfectly sensible explanation for a man's "slowness": he just looks around. Such a man is serious and selective; he needs a quality woman nearby, that's why he "quietly" looks for the best choice.
The solutions available to a woman who is waiting for a man to make the first move
As you can see, there are several factors that prevent a man from making the first move on a woman, and the problem is that it is often impossible to determine which of them is genuine at the beginning of the conversation. Therefore, the woman asks a very logical question: how should she act in this situation ? Is it worth it for her to take the initiative, or should we wait for the guy to make up his mind ?
The rare woman has a lot of patience in a state of uncertainty. She needs to know as soon as possible whether she should rely on this handsome man or not. Unfortunately, this impatience can play a cruel trick on him. For example, a man who is insecure, has no initiative or is just a boor may find himself in the spotlight.
He is used to having everything done for him by others, and if a woman takes the initiative, he instantly gets in touch with her. Such a man will basically do whatever he is told to do, but does the woman need that ? First he is asked out, then he is asked to marry, then he is asked to take out a loan or have a baby, and years later his wife will complain that her husband can't do anything himself.
If you take the example of an overconfident man and take the initiative first, in most cases you will end up with a broken trough. He needs women to push him to act, but he doesn't want to be pushed will not show much interest in them. Even if you manage to have a serious relationship with such a man, it is likely that he will have relationships on the side, because without the attention of different women, he simply can not live.
Taking active steps towards a man who doesn't know what he wants at the moment could have a positive result. Perhaps the initiative of an attractive woman will encourage him, give meaning to his life and allow him to heal his old wounds. But here it is necessary to be very careful, without any pressure, because there is a good chance that he will only have a friendly relationship with a woman who is always ready to support and help him.
Thus, the initiative of a woman in a situation where the man is afraid to make the first move is quite ambiguous. It's like playing the lottery: you can either bet it all and win big, or you can go broke. Many people think thatit is better to try and lose than to do nothing. If a woman is aware of the risk of losing, which can hurt her, and she is not afraid of anything, it is worth trying. But when a girl is not quite sure of herself and the fear of rejection is great, it is better to adopt a wait-and-see attitude.
Everyone knows that such men are hunters, interested in women, attracted to mystery and discretion. If you immediately put all the cards on the table, if the "prey" falls into the hands of the hunter, he quickly loses interest. Then we should sit and wait for the man to gather his thoughts ?
In general, yes, but we must not forget a particular female weapon: seduction. You should always look attractive, smile and flirt, and the more natural and relaxed your behavior is, the faster the man will take action. Work or study, play sports or dance, go to exhibitions and other events so that you don't get hung up on one handsome man, because true love comes when you least expect it.
Who should make the first move in a relationship ?
It seems that the time is over when girls had to humbly wait for their soul mate. Today, no one will be surprised by a cheerful woman ready to fight for his happiness. At the same time, the judgment that men have relaxed a little also becomes relevant. But many are willing to explain such behavior.
So what is the right thing to do for both sexes to find their love ? We are not going to judge anyone and give a guide for action. However, we are going to tell you how things work in the dating world and try to change the minds of those who are afraid of this very first step.
In today's world, dating is a sad state of affairs. It seems that it used to be easier to meet your soul mate, despite the absence of gadgets, the Internet and a million pick-up places in town. Virtually anyone living in a metropolis and "actively looking" will tell you that it is quite difficult to find someone for a serious relationship except by using an effective dating site. There has been a re-evaluation of the values and roles of men and women in society. If previous generations thought that only men should take the initiative, today everything has been turned upside down. For us, it is absolutely normal that the first to show interest is a girl.
Stereotypes
Despite the popularization of feminist movements and other trends, the belief that the man must be the first to show interest is widespread. Yes, many girls are ready to take the lead, because modern men sometimes don't give a chance. However, in this case, the role of "conqueror", which is so dear to guys. What to do ? Stop messing around. Love has no boundaries. And it doesn't matter who gets involved in a relationship first. She just wants it to happen. And as soon as possible, otherwise it will have to lurk in your heart, constantly hurting you and reminding you of the missed opportunities. And it's not good for you or for this beautiful feeling.
The syndrome of the broken heart
Let's not forget the fear of being rejected. Any person, no matter how brave, in the face of sympathy or love, becomes fearful. Those who have experienced real feelings at least once will understand what we are talking about. After all, there's nothing worse than a broken heart, and no one is safe from it. Skeptics can now start beating their chests and shouting that they don't believe in all this romantic nonsense.
But let's not lie and admit that it is this fear that has kept people silent for months, even years, hiding their true feelings. How to overcome it ? Be honest with yourself, try not to live in an illusion, while not giving up in advance. After all, it may never happen again.
Girls are still waiting for a "prince
Since childhood, the girl sees the perfect image of how princesses get to Prince Charming. But in life, that doesn't always happen. And this does not mean that the lover is not such, if not immediately obtained a star of the sky. Yes, everyone has different needs and beliefs. And someone's really going to be happy, following the principle of "mine will find me". Girls, think about it, are you ready to fight for your happiness ?
As we said, in today's world, it is too difficult to find the ideal girlfriend in a snap of the fingers. You have to try, stumble and look again. You may even meet an unrequited love. But it does not mean that you can not act if you realize that you want to try. Many men have admitted that approaching and meeting a girl they like is extremely stressful for them.
They feel they have no right to make mistakes. Maybe the person you are constantly thinking about is also thinking about you, but is afraid to admit it. It does not mean that we will let you hang yourself. If you are always sure that you are ready to wait for your "prince", imagine how long it will take you to wait. At least let the man you like know that you care about him.
Men are relaxed
Many girls think that most men today have become lazy. Some of you may think that it is the norm to do things that once seemed to be the exception to the rule. But wait. If it is difficult for you, imagine how difficult it is for the girls. After all, they have a "code" to break.
And you, it is inherent in your nature. Since you rarely talk about your feelings, the only thing left is to act. Otherwise, the girl you love will end up with the one who is more determined. And men with a broken heart are more difficult to live with than women. You can settle for anything, making sure yours won't leave you. But it will not. He will do it, and he will slam the door.
The verdict
There is only no good answer to the question "who should make the first move ? ". Everyone should understand that happiness and love are fragile things. For them to hold on and fight, otherwise you can wait your whole life, sob and sit in the corner in fear realizing that you could make at least one step towards their happiness. But you have never done it.