In a comment Stephen asks me a question regarding the be a good guy.
hello reborn.being a good guy is fine after she tries attraction.But being a good guy even after the attraction there is no danger that she won't try it again and consequently consider us friends?That is, the attraction that he has for us is cancelled?
Let's say you have met a girl, and instead of being a good guy and ending up in the friend zone, you create attraction.
As you know, now it's not over, you move on to the rapport phase, that is, that phase where she knows us better, then you go towards closure and relationship.
At this point being a good guy in this phase is useful?
The answer is: you simply have to agree on terminology.
1)
In a first understanding of the term, we can see the "good guy" as the one who he is too much of a good guy.
A man like this, it is easy to let other people, including women, step on his toes. Easily will not be decided in his actions, and perhaps always let women choose what to do, where to go, and how to spend time.
At the first sign of departure of her, he will become pleading, and at that very moment the story is over.
Such a man, if he can create attraction (which is not easy), he will struggle so much to be with a woman, and will probably end up with a girl of little value.
2)
In a second meaning we can see the good guy as the man who thinks that the way to conquer a woman is just "be good", that is Be sweet, kind and caring.
He's not as much of a suck-up as the previous one, but he's not as assertive and self-assured either, and even he at the first hint of departure from her, it is easy to become a doormat.
Generally speaking, we could say that most Italian males fall into this category.
When a man like this gets with a woman, the relationship usually ends for two reasons.
a. she loses attraction, as Stefano says, because he softens over time. Not that he was a champion of masculinity before, but as the months go by he loses what little masculine energy he had. In this case, she gets fed up and leaves him when she finds the strength to do so
b. she finds a man more alpha than him, or simply someone new, and as is natural she falls in love with him. Often there is betrayal, maybe even for a prolonged time, until she breaks up with him and goes with the new guy.
3)
Here is the meaning that I like the most, that of the good guy who partly does the good, but not forgetting to be a real man.
In fact, on the one hand, he maintains those characteristics that drive all women crazy, such as confidence, positive dominance, imperturbability etc. etc.
On the other hand, he is aware of the fact that a woman needs something else, i.e. protection (especially emotional), security and stability. So from that perspective, you could say she's being a good guy, but my opinion she's simply being a real man.
Responding then to Stephen's question, a man of this type is not in any danger of ending up in the friendship zone, because it always maintains that male/female polarity that generates attraction at all times.